Thursday, September 15, 2011

If only I could use this power for good...

Sell low, buy high. That's my family motto. My mom had Dime Saving Bank stocks for 30 years. She bought at $19 and finally gave up and sold at $17 after all that time. A month later the stock rose to $25.

When my mom passed, she left me a nice inheritance and for the first time in our lives, we had money to invest. The market had done gangbusters for decades. We invested in the Fall of 2000. Next year 9/11 happened and everything took a nose dive. It took 7 years to ALMOST recover to our initial principle which we quickly got out of the market.

And so the curse continued...

You can't go wrong with real estate! Couldn't argue with the logic. Our Maine house was now worth way more than we paid for it after 20 years and the day we were moving a New York retired cop offered us 30,000 less than we were asking and we said no, thinking we would surely get our price. That was October of '07. We moved out and bought a house in Georgia with savings and the inheritance. We got it at what we thought was a good price and were proud that we didn't have to carry a mortgage. A good investment with our nest egg.

September of '08, the greedy bast**ds of finance plotted against the great masses of EVERYONE else to crash our houses around our ears. So where's my freaking bailout now that our OWN money, not some bank's, OUR OWN money, with which we always tried to be fiscally responsible, was, for a second time, torn away from us by the fat cats. Twenty friggin' years in Maine and if we had waited one more year, we could have gotten the bargain of our lives on a home.

So now we lost more than 1/3 of our own money on our new home, can't sell our Maine home for anything remotely NEAR what the cop offered that day.

So you can't go wrong with real estate... that is until I get there.

We moved to Georgia in Fall of '07. In the Spring of '08 we got hit with one of those 50 year tornadoes. "Ain't never had one of them round these parts for decades!"
Yeah, I'm here now, just you wait and see!!

So far, in just under 4 years, we've had the worst drought on record, the worst flooding on record, hail, snow, felt the recent earthquake...

Tomorrow's Saturday. What shall it be? Toads, boils or locusts... I just can't choose...

Is is just me or shouldn't there be a way to use this power for good. Maybe I should buy stock in companies that I hate and bring them all to their knees!!

I've gained so much weight that, by now, I should be too big to fail!!

A sh*t-storm seems to follow me wherever I go, so why not let it rain on someone else for a change?

To bite or not to bite... no question!




Saw 'Fright Night"!! Bloody good fun without one sparkly, vegetarian vampire in sight!

Is it just me, or does a non-sucking child of the night simply lose all the sexy? Like Damon Salvatore from Vampire Diaries said... "You're dead, dude. Get over it."


Sunday, August 7, 2011

Need their feet nailed to the floor...

I was in WalMart with my hubby last night, just because it was SO blistering hot and humid, but I felt like walking, so WallyWorld seemed like a good air-conditioned spot.
We were traversing up and down the aisles and came to the toy section... Now let me preface that I have NOTHING against kids (I like them with onions and salt)... but I like good manners and just stare agog at miserably behaved buggers.
There were 3 boys on bikes tearing around knocking boxes off the end of aisles, braking, skidding and wreaking havoc as only boys can. Snips and snails and puppy dog tails, my A$$!!
Other little "men" were Nerf sword and axe battling, leaving one sword in pieces. How the hell do you break a NERF sword??!!
There were no employees around, but even two startled adults did nothing to make them slow down or even notice our existence. If we had been knocked out, they would have considered us speed bumps on which to take off!!
There's a time and a place for fun, but destruction of property is not in the description! Who the heck raises these animals... no wait, that's insulting to animals.
Is it just me, or should this village of two have helped to raise these children by pushing a pole into their spokes and sent them a$$ over tea kettle?




I'm watching the three of you...

According to Jon Ronson in "The Psychopath Test", one in four people is a psychopath.
This explains EVERYTHING!!!

...and I'm watching the three of you...




Thursday, August 4, 2011

Memories of Love... Mom, Dad and dancing...

I know it's not in character with the grouchiness of the blog, but I've been waxing nostalgic lately, and been missing my mom and dad!
Dad, my best friend, has been gone for 37 years and Mom for 11 years.




Total Amnesia... (Spoiler alert for "Unknown")

Please don't read unless you want to know the end of "Unknown" with Liam Neeson!!


We rented "Unknown" last night, and when it ended, I realized it was just another "re-imagining" of an old plot. I looked through the myriad of posts on Rotten Tomatoes to see if anyone else had gotten the same idea, but I guess no one remembers history either.


(Spoiler alert)


It's a rehash of "Total Recall" without the cheezy CG!!
Nice guy finds out people are trying to kill him... "wife" winds up being just a "bad-guy" partner,... takes up with pretty girl/good fighter,... finds out he's been brainwashed (or amnesia) and was a real creep beforehand,... stops the "bad guys" who used to be his friends and associates,... and lets the masses get free stuff that they had been paying for before!! "Total Recall"-free air, "Unknown"- free corn... yes, I said corn.
There was even an African American taxi-driver thrown in (although in Recall he turned out to be a bad guy, in Unknown you don't trust him, but he dies).


There HAVE to be original scripts languishing out there waiting to be tried that aren't remakes or re-imaginings!! Hollywood is just a big snooze these days!



What were they thinking?


So I was taking a pee in my local movie theater bathroom, and it occurred to me that it had to be a mean spirited man who thought to install those spare tire sized toilet paper dispensers in the stalls. After all, having to change the roll only once a year is right up there with the really important male fantasies, isn’t it!? And who thought to install them at floor height? Are only children and little people using public toilets these days? So here I am, precariously crouched over the bowl so as not to let any part of my anatomy touch ANYTHING, one arm stretched out behind me as a support, trying not to drip into my knee straddling panties, holding my pants up so they won’t touch the floor, and now I have to make a right angle, sideways bend in my torso to reach the opening of the TP dispenser. Yoga was not on my urine elimination agenda today. And guess what?... no paper end to be found! They made these rolls so big and heavy that that you can only get one sheet at a time without tearing, or worse yet, you may get three sheets but then the next end ends up deep inside the bowels of this dispenser from hell!! So with my third hand, I have to reach elbow deep into the jaws to retrieve my one sheet ration, while counting off the litany of the saints under my breath. By now I’m ready to remove my panties, use them to wipe myself and toss them in the trash on the way out.


Is it just me, or are public toilet designers just drunk, misogynistic b*st*rds?


Don’t get me started on the bowl sitting against one wall of the stall instead of in the middle...