What were they thinking?

So I was taking a pee in my local movie theater bathroom, and it occurred to me that it had to be a mean spirited man who thought to install those spare tire sized toilet paper dispensers in the stalls. After all, having to change the roll only once a year is right up there with the really important male fantasies, isn’t it!? And who thought to install them at floor height? Are only children and little people using public toilets these days? So here I am, precariously crouched over the bowl so as not to let any part of my anatomy touch ANYTHING, one arm stretched out behind me as a support, trying not to drip into my knee straddling panties, holding my pants up so they won’t touch the floor, and now I have to make a right angle, sideways bend in my torso to reach the opening of the TP dispenser. Yoga was not on my urine elimination agenda today. And guess what?... no paper end to be found! They made these rolls so big and heavy that that you can only get one sheet at a time without tearing, or worse yet, you may get three sheets but then the next end ends up deep inside the bowels of this dispenser from hell!! So with my third hand, I have to reach elbow deep into the jaws to retrieve my one sheet ration, while counting off the litany of the saints under my breath. By now I’m ready to remove my panties, use them to wipe myself and toss them in the trash on the way out.


Is it just me, or are public toilet designers just drunk, misogynistic b*st*rds?


Don’t get me started on the bowl sitting against one wall of the stall instead of in the middle...